Don't Expect Much

Lowered expectations are so dreadful. Essentially it is never believing the best of anything. Fortunately low expectations do have some benefits that can work in our daily lives. For me the bar had always been set high, especially when it comes to relationships. For instance I expect the people in my life to follow a laundry list of things. Anything contradictory to the list results in immediate expulsion from friendship. Many people have admired this about me. But trust me when I say it has had it's downfalls. As a result of the high expectations, I have made many good quality friends. However those are few. Once again, no matter how long the friendship had been, or how much I really liked the person; if they ever violated my list, they were gone.

Which leads to the topic at hand. I've noticed many people who have maintained friendships with others (despite the horrendous things those people may have done) lead happier lives. These 'friend keeprs' have a plethora of acquaintances and a never ending  social lifestyle. Rather than eliminating the person as a friend, they keep them at bay while happily floating through their other choices of friends. So the question is, do I really care about keeping and maintaining friendships? Of course I do. It wasn't until I was at the bottom of the pit that I realised I had practically no one in my life to throw me a rope. The secret to keeping and maintaining friendships is to ultimately lower my expectations.

In general sometimes we set our relationship bars way to high. The people in our lives are expected to call us weekly if not daily. They are expected to be there when we need a shoulder to cry on. They must loan us money when we're broke and if they ever ignore or forget a birthday it's a wrap! When we expect the people in our lives to keep up with this list, I can almost guarantee we end up disappointed majority of the time.

I'm freeing my mind of this anxiety and am facing the fact that no one is made perfect. Thank God for the power of forgiveness for without it the entire world would be a collection of friendless, loveless introverts. Building up these high expectations creates a barrier that can not allow room to grow. Let's face it, without people in our lives we are useless. They inspire us, motivate us, make us laugh, cheer us on and so much more. The more you have, the better your life can be. I will keep in mind that quality is still a very important factor, but my list of qualities will never again hinder me from keeping good people in my life.

Today I am lowering some of my absurd expectations. Yes, they may forget to call me in over three months, and yes they may forget a birthday or two, but they are still my friends. And that is something I should never expect to change.